Mixed media layout "Being a mother..."

Hey all,

In light of some recent stuff going on in my life, I felt the need to scrap a layout about my feelings. 

On April 4 my little boy Connor suddenly got a lump on his neck. The lump got bigger and after being told by the doctor  a couple of times that it would go away on its own, we were sent to the hospital after all, because it just kept growing. 

Since a couple of days before that hospital visit the lump had started to hurt Connor and his skin turned more red by the day.

Long story short: ultrasound, doctor, surgeon, pediatrician, and finally surgery to remove the entire infected gland on Wednsesday, May 18.

We are still awaiting the final test results, but already know the infection wasn't caused by something scary and incurable like cancer. 

However, back when things weren't clear yet, I suffered through some rough times, driving myself crazy with thoughts of bad things. The thought of losing Connor hurt so much it made me cry more than once. 

Just looking at his lump hurt, I can't stand him being in pain. 

I'm so glad the surgery is over, because staying with him until he finally succumbed to the anesthetics, watching him cry and scream, made me cry even harder.

The day after the surgery Connor already didn't experience any pain anymore. The last few days he has a soar throat and I don't know what to think about that. He's been feeling off. I just hope that whatever is plaguing him, will vanish soon.
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The May moodboard from the "Scraps of Darkness & Scraps of Elegance" blog was one of my inspiration sources.
Scrapsofdarkness.blogspot.nl

The moodboard over at "Mixed Media Place" for the May challenge was a perfect fit for the colors and feel I had in mind. That one quote from the moodboard, "She believed she could, so she did", could have been written just for me during this period. I had to believe I could get through this, when I didn't really feel like an adult myself. So I was brave for my little man!

The quote I used for my layout is another one though, because it perfectly describes the feelings I am trying to convey. 

"Being a mother is discovering strengths you didn't know you had and dealing with fears you never knew existed."

Pictured above are almost all of the ingredients you'll need. 

The shades of Tattered Angels glimmermist I used are the following: Verdigris, Latte, Jazz Blue, Walnutgold and chalkboard French Vanilla (for the splatters) and also Glimmerglam Tail Fin (which I forgot to include in the picture!). 

Started my layout by choosing the perfect paper from Kaisercraft, "Antique Bazaar Collection: Unearth".

I wanted the layout to have a 'prickly' feel, so I chose a Sheena stencil with thorn pattern. Applied Viva Decor's "Rusty Paper" through it.

This layout is full of symbolism: rusty staples are holding many things together, to represent both the stitches Connor has gotten, as well as the pieces of my broken heart being held together.

That beaten up and broken heart was made from brown wire, around which I wrapped henp rope in a crazy pattern.

For the middle part I used a shred of paper with bark printed on it, layered onto some fabric which I colored using my old bottle of Walnut Ink.

Used some pieces of bandage (again with a double meaning) colored with Tattered Angels glimmermist "Verdigris" to tie up some more loose ends.

The chipboard clock (from Sandra's Hobbyshop) represents the time ticking away, leaving us hoping, fearing and wondering.

The patterned crosses woodboard background pieces aren't a coincidence either: everybody knows what the Red Cross stands for.

I kept most of the elements on my layout nature related. Also inspired by the feathers from the Mixed Media Place moodboad. It merely enhanced the feeling I already had. Used feathers, a shred of paper with bark print, some wood chips my dad sawed from a branch, a chipboard dandelion from Scrapiniec, wood angel's wings, a small metal arrow and branch.
I'll leave you with some more close-ups. Hope you'll like it! Questions and comments are always welcome!

You can find me on Facebook too: Less is bore
And also in Instagram:mandylessibore

HAPPY SCRAPPING!